Hmm.. Mmmm.. Uhhh..

Scott came over today.. Was pretty glad when he called to tell me that.. I was waiting eagerly spinning around the hall with the chair. Anyway i'm always very glad when he comes over no matter what. So anyways.. He came over with his black singlet n limping.. Poor guy.. But Nice.. hehe. Kinda like guys in singlets but only if they have muscles n not flabby arms n only with that kind of singlet u noe..That one kind la.. hehe.. In short, I like!

We were sitting watching tv & he was pinchin,punchin,boxin, wateva u name it.. But today.. My only two reations were 'the stare' and 'Stop it.Pain'. N of course not the usual me for not reacting aggresively by hittin him back or using my nails. Today, all I did was sit quietly next to him,curled up with my back against the chair handle. He did ask me why was I in a very weird behaviour several times.. But all I did was lean on his shoulder and answered.. 'I'm ok'. I was really glad that he was next to me but All I felt was wanting to hide my face against his nice black singlet n cry.. Well.. I'm ok I guess but also not at the same time. I was so tempted to put my head against his chest,with my eyes close and just lie into space with the sound of his heart beat. Love doing that.. I honestly find it very soothing n i would fall asleep most likely. But today, tears would most likely have sipped out of my closed eyes too. N those tears would have been tears of joy and relieve. Just not feeling very bubbly n all when i'm all by myself at home.. A lot of stuff makes me upset when I'm at home. Feels like a lot of things are running through my head but I'm not too sure on which to catch hold of first. When Scott came, I was really glad but when he had to leave.. I really wish I could grumble the whole night long so that he would stay for a few more secs each time I grumbled. The grumble trick lasted for a few minutes, with me just resting my head on his shoulder & him making me smile. Unfortunately, I had to take a step backwards, move out of his arms & let go of my fingers n arms held together around him.. N there he went... Off to Bryan's house. N me.. I shall be off to dreamland. Hmmm... Good nite..